I’m certain I don’t love it here yet.

Not unlike back in dirty jersey, I have been working a lot. This would not surprise people who are closest to me. But really, I did not expect the workload to be so immense. I think once I find a way to balance work and real life, I will enjoy it more here. It doesn’t help though, that I live in faculty dorms and lack a real connection with anyone on campus. Actually, it can be quite isolating. The kind of isolation you would find while in the world's most populous country, not really know a single soul. But, I prepared myself for this. While the isolation can be quite meditative, less demanding, it can also lead one to feel like Tom Hanks in Castaway. (Don’t worry, guys, I won’t start drawing faces on inanimate objects in desperation for deeper human interaction.) I do miss you guys, but I’m really not dwelling on the fact that I am in a foreign country without the people I care about the most. I come from a family of immigrants. I’ll survive and I know it. It just makes me feel a bit insecure at times. So much so, that I’m already feeling like I can’t work abroad for more than these ten months.

This past Saturday, I had come back from a trip (which I will tell you about in a sec!) and was rolling my suitcase back to my apartment when I passed a neighboring family that was just hanging out on my floor, outside of their apartment door. One of their children saw me and blew me a raspberry. It took me by surprise but I found it funny. The kid was so fucking adorable. I didn’t find it funny, however when the child proceeded to follow me, gave my suitcase a furious kick, saying something I did not understand, while his family laughed behind him. It’s not cool for a kid no older than 3 to make you feel like an outcast.

Workload and isolation aside, I should probably tell you about my trip to Xi’an. So many good things to talk about here! Admittedly, it wasn’t my idea to go but I met a really cool fellow social studies teacher at training during my first week in Shanghai, whose total credit this trip goes to. (Fact: most history teachers I meet are pretty badass comrades…most). We had a 3-day weekend and decided to meet in Xi’an in Shaanxi province. The city is one of the oldest cities in China and I wish we had more time to see some of the sites we missed out on. We did, however, get to see the aaamaaziiing and famed Terracotta Warriors as well as the old Xi’an city walls, among a few other historical sites. The highlight, however, was the Great Mosque of Xi’an.

The architecture of the Mosque resembles traditional Chinese buildings, as opposed to classic mosques. The only recognizable feature is the Islamic calligraphy on the walls. I wasn’t even certain it was the mosque until we realized Google maps was off on its location. The Mosque is a calm oasis from the bustle outside its doors and the best part is that it is still in regular use. While Muslims quietly entered to pray Maghrib prayers, some nonMuslims quietly entered to get a glimpse of the devout umma from the plaza within the stunning mosque walls. Despite its long history, it is not a secured and regulated site swelling with tourists, like other tourist sites I have seen. It was refreshing. The Mosque has an undeniable presence and I really wanted to pray there. Unfortunately, like mosques in Pakistan, prayer was limited to men, but I had this warmhearted guide direct me to another mosque just outside its doors. Even there, there were no sisters in sight, but I prayed respectfully behind the men and honestly, it felt like just what I needed. My friends and family know that I have had my fair share of personal experiences that have shaken my faith, but I am slowly figuring out what Islam means to my life. This experience has unquestionably given me (at least within that moment) some clarity.

Because I had such I good time in Xi’an, I am going to commit to venturing out more. I think the isolation out here made me too withdrawn to consider it on my own. I know if I have more of these experiences, instead of working so much, I will find myself loving it here in no time. If I don’t come back with a bunch of travel adventures, I totally give you permission to kick my ass.

I miss you much. You know who you are.

Things I have learned thus far:

It has only been three weeks (I use "only" a bit reluctantly) but I have already learned so much, so I figured I should share my knowledge with you all.

1. The one-child policy doesn't just exempt rural families. Lots of families, including most of my students', have several children. Some urban families, especially the more well-off who can support raising larger families, are opting to have multiple children even if that means paying hefty fines.

2. China is very single-girl-traveling-places-alone friendly. People stare A LOT (and sometimes it can feel a bit invasive) but for the most part, no one bothers with me. Besides, the people whose jaws do drop (literally!) when they see me, probably had minimal firsthand experience with a foreigner. Sometimes though, I want to walk down the street without random people yelling "hello!" until I stop ignoring them, look back, and reply with a "hello." Maybe it's the highlight of their day? I don't know. Apart from this nuisance, China is super safe and if you love traveling alone by foot to new places, this feels like the place to be.

3. Don't use a tea maker to make coffee because you are so desperate for caffeine. The boiling hot water from your new water steamer may shatter the thin glass of your tea maker and you will feel sorry for yourself as you clean up the resulting mess. Note: Luckily, I didn't get burned and I just bought a french press, it's all good. (I know, I know. I should have brought the one you gave me, Robina!)

4. This one's for those who think a teacher's job is a piece of cake. The past two weeks here have reminded me that a teacher's job is always so demanding. The demands just vary among different populations of students.

5. You need to learn Mandarin/Cantonese just for ordering food. Most small, family restaurants here don't have picture menus. But dear god, it feels like winning the lottery when you do come across one!

6. It's kind of annoying shopping at the mall here. A retail worker WILL follow you around, flash you different items, and insist you try the items on if you say you like them. It's very different etiquette than what I am used to. I just want to say "Yo, chill. I'll let you know if I need your assistance."

7. Chinese languages are hard to learn because the primary ones are tonal languages. This isn't new BUT I have discovered that I have an ear for Mandarin and can easily replicate the sounds. I think this is because I am constantly learning and relearning Urdu, took Spanish in high school, and learned to read Arabic as a kid. In short, if you had access to many languages already, Chinese isn't too bad to learn to speak. Reading and writing it, however, is a whole other ball game.

8. Yes, the exchange rate between the American dollar and the RMB is pretty sweet for the American traveler: 1 yuan equals $0.16.  I was surprised to find out though, 1 yuan here has strong purchasing power. It's pretty great when I think of how cheap some items I buy are when I covert the prices to dollars in my head.

9. On a personal note: I learned I am not as patient as I thought. I have to spend a lot of time here with someone who I find INCREDIBLY dumb. Dumb AND socially inept! I am trying to be patient, but I can't hide how I feel about this person to this person's face. I am frustrated with myself on this one.

10. I like lists when I blog buuuut this list has reached its end.

Be well. I miss you, North Amreeka!

FIrst Week in Shunde

Upon arriving to Guangzhou Airport, the teacher I would be working with and I were picked up by the our students’ homeroom teacher, Binley. Binley took us to dinner near our school campus in Shunde and soon enough, I was in my new apartment. Honestly, I have very few complaints since settling in here. I like it. My apartment in faculty housing is simple, but seeing as how I live in the same-sized apartment as many teachers raising small children, I really shouldn’t complain.

The next few days, consisted of Binley showing us around school, helping us open up a local bank account, get a local phone number, and basically get acquainted with our new surroundings. He and his wife took us to Lucky City, the local mall, which could really be any mall in the US. We only spent a little bit of time here so I definitely want to go back to shop! We also met some local coordinators of the program, the headmaster, and briefly, our students. I could not help but feel from everyone’s kindness that Americans are such assholes. We tend to stay locked up in our own struggles in our minds and never want to go out of our way for others. Here, no one really shows any personal struggle they may be facing. They stay present and want everyone around them to be happy and secure. There are downfalls to that, but I do wish I can take this mindful habit back with me.

The school, itself, is huge. There are 3,000 students and 300 teachers. The campus is open and has several basketball courts, tennis courts, a pool, and a gym, aside from the several classroom buildings. It was built in 2008 in just 5 months, which is clearly spoken from its very utilitarian facade. The classrooms are hooked up with smartboards, microphones, and a visualizer (the camera version of the projector, which I LOVE!) I don’t even have to buy my own paper and I can send copies to a copy room, instead of running around finding an available machine. And get this: the cafeteria food is great and free for teachers! The reason why the school can afford these amenities is because it was founded by a construction firm that pretty much owns much of the area around the school. It's also a private boarding school for middle-class families. Apparently, the locals consider it the rich part of town.

Classes started last week and we ran diagnostics with the students. It seems that a lot of them have much lower English skills than I imagined. At first, I thought it was going to be a struggle. I have taught a few classes since then, and I think my students are brilliant already. They are so loveable and their minds are like sponges because they are incredibly curious. While the students in China have been trained to carry themselves in the classroom in such a manner, I can’t help but compare it to the training my Newark students underwent. They, on the other hand, were trained by a different kind of education, in and out of the class, where many seem to have had the curiosity sucked nearly dry out of them.

The workload has ben pretty insane and that’s why I haven’t posted in a long time but as my work/sleep routine balances out, I promise to be more consistent. Before I go, a few quick developments:

1. I went for a 3-hour walk around my school and didn’t get lost. I found a bike a store and I bought a bike. Fucking success. 

2. In most other spheres of life I stand firmly against standardization… standardized tests, standardized education, standardized definitions of beauty, but can we please adopt a standard for bathrooms worldwide? I’m getting used to carrying toilet paper and hand sanitizer to the bathroom but I don’t think I should have to! 

3. Hang drying clothes ain’t that bad. 

4. Men gawk and honk their horn whether you are in Jersey or China. Some things never change, I guess.
5. Talking to friends and family back home is keeping me sane.

Salaam!